Traci

Traci Lynn Ratliff was born at 1:01 p.m. on October 11, 1968.
The sweetest little thing I’d ever seen.

I awoke that morning with some back pain. Not bad, so I had Harm drop me off at my Mother’s house, about 7:00 a.m., before he went to work. I insisted he go to work. I never did like a lot of drama. Went to the Dr. at 10:00 a.m. He examined me and told me to go to the hospital and he’d meet me there. OK. I called Harm home, we stopped by our house to let me grab a few things---no, I didn’t have my bag packed. I guess I’ve always been a last minute kinda gal.

We got to the hospital about noon. Traci blessed us with her appearance (she looked like an Eskimo baby, I swear) at 1:01 p.m. Not a bad time frame for a first baby. Quick and easy. And so worth every bead of sweat.

She was everyone’s darling. The first granddaughter on both sides. The first grand either set of parents had been around. My sister had boys, but they were an Army family and we saw very little of them. So, she was rather like the first for BOTH sets of grandparents. Spoiled? You betcha! By everyone.

The day was wonderful until Guess Who stepped into my room with his congratulations? Yep. FIL. Without a lot of details, let’s just say I banished him from my room and my life. Again.

It came to pass that the only visiting Harm’s parents were allowed to do with Traci was at their house when Harm took her over. I wouldn’t go. For several months. Finally, I decided to put my feelings for FIL aside. My anger was hurting both my husband and his mother. It just didn’t feel fair anymore. So, I swallowed my pride……….with much difficulty, mind you.

And I started visiting again too. I wasn’t comfortable for a very long time. But, I did it and in retrospect, it was the right thing to do. And surprisingly, a lot of years down the road, I’ve almost forgiven him. Not quite, but I learned to live with it. I loved Ruby, they were my girls grandparents. So, I made it work till the day he died.

And yes, I even made that SOB’s funeral arrangements. And paid for his grave and burial. Thank you very much.

And life for the happy little family went on. We bought a cute little house with a nice big lot in Lincoln Park. We had an apple, a pear and a cherry tree in the backyard. And a nice size front porch. It needed a little work, but we did it. Luckily, Harm was handy with tools and very good with math. He’d taught me to paint in our rented homes, so I could handle that.

I remember the first time we tackled painting a bedroom together. Mind you, prior to that day the only thing I’d ever painted was a closet. One closet. Well, when he told me I painted like I was whitewashing a barn, it really hurt my feelings. So, through 19 year old tears, I told him to kiss my ass and finish it himself. Once he apologized, I let him actually TEACH me how to paint. Such funny memories.

So, together we hung wallpaper---no, not giant flowers---red print for the kitchen with the perfect green in it to match our beautiful shiny ,new ,so very with it ,Avocado Green appliances. Yuk now. Very with it for the times. We retiled floors, put down carpet and antiqued cupboards, in of course, Avocado Green! And hung clown wallpaper in Traci’s room. Damn, it was cute.


We had a costume party for Halloween that first year in the house. It was a blast. Harm and I dressed as Cleopatra and Caesar. My father shocked us by showing up as a very ugly woman. He was hilarious, pink lace dress and stubble. You had to love him. Aunt Eleanore was a clown, Cousins Bob & JoAnne were Dracula & Raggedy Anne. We even had a very pregnant bride --great costume from old curtains--very risqué for 1970. Linda was a Martian and Richard was a Robot. Tin foil box w/ flashing light and all. Damn Linda. We had hardwood floors in the living room and hall. She made her costume of this very glittery cheap fabric. Everywhere she went glitter spilled around her. I lived in that house for another two years and every time I swept the floors, every time, I swear, I swept up more of her damn green glitter. Another smile now.
By this time, Harm was doing well at work and learning his tool making skills. I was working for Michigan Bell. My sister got me in. That’s when the phone company had the monopoly. I was a service rep and loved my job. Mother watched Traci for us. Later on, when Linda had Matthew, she watched both kids and loved every minute of it. Funny, how that whole five week early due date faded off into the blue, never to be mentioned again. I guess time really does heal.

Linda and I would each take a bus from home and meet in downtown Detroit every morning and ride the rest of the way to work together. Same after work. That’s back when Detroit was actually a city. After the riots of ‘67, but before the city died completely. Once or twice I’ve wondered what would have happened had I gone back after my maternity leave. I could have retired from there, with a great pension by now. But, how different my life would have turned out. And I still kinda like it the way it is.

Linda was always petite. (bitch) We used to shop after work sometimes. She loved the end of season shoe sales. Back when there were numerous independently owned shoe stores. And great deals. Pre Payless BOGO, etc.

She’d pick up the sample shoes - size 4 ½ or 5 - for maybe $1.00 or $2.00 a pair for really good, top of the line shoes. Damn her, I wore a 6 ½ and wasn’t nearly as fortunate in finding the deals as she was. I always seemed to be toting her obscenely good deals to the bus stop, handing them off and taking my measly purchases home. Sometimes average sucks.